Student POV: Dealing with Differences in a Dorm Room
Living in the dorms for the first time is an adjustment. Most students share a room with two or three other students. Multiple people with varying personalities are bound to have disagreements. But differences don’t have to cause division. It’s possible to resolve conflicts and remain friends.
Dorm life can teach students valuable lessons about themselves and how they treat other people. Having roommates will test your patience, kindness, and adaptability, but it will also allow you to show Christ’s love to others. Here are some tips to consider before and after moving into the dorms.
Be Patient
Having patience with your roommates is essential to resolving conflicts. Everyone is different. Differing backgrounds and lifestyles must be considered. Some students have never shared a room. Others have never been taught how to be a good roommate.
If they have habits that bother you, kindly let them know. Maybe they clutter shared spaces or leave their stuff lying around the room. Staying silent will fail to resolve the issue. The first step is communication, but you must try to understand where your roommate is coming from. The second step is remaining patient as you find a system that works.
Keeping a patient attitude is far from easy. Showing kindness to difficult people is only accomplished with God’s help and guidance. Pray often for the strength you need to show Christ’s love in every situation. God uses difficult circumstances to help His children become more Christ-like. He will ultimately use your current difficulty for good in your journey of sanctification.
Be Understanding
Every person has struggles that shape their actions and attitudes. Strive to understand your roommate’s struggles and circumstances. Maybe they stay up late talking on the phone because of something happening at home. Or maybe they are over-committed and do homework way too late. Remember that college is hard for everyone. All students need extra kindness and understanding.
Sometimes, adaptability is the key to being a good roommate. Learn how to thrive in uncomfortable circumstances. You may have to adapt your routine or preferences based on your roommates. Maybe you like going to sleep early or you like waking up early, but your roommates are on the opposite schedule. Instead of becoming upset or irritated, adapt. As Christians, we are called to prefer others over ourselves. Spread kindness and show Christ’s love. Allow living in the dorms to help you grow.
Be Helpful
Find ways to help your roommates succeed. When you see your roommates as people you are called to serve, conflicts begin to lessen. Living in the dorms is an opportunity to practice kindness and service. If you know one of your roommates is having a stressful week, find ways to bless them. Take care of their room assignments for one day or write them a note of encouragement. Something as simple as taking a moment to ask them how they’re doing or pray with them is enough. Let your roommates know that you’re available as a friend and brother or sister in Christ.
God calls us to love each other, and the dorms are a test of that love. If we are unable to support each other in this capacity, our usefulness for the cause of Christ is called into question. Christians are meant to be lights in the world. That light should extend to everyone, even other Christians.
Living in the dorms will test your patience, but you will have the opportunity to grow spiritually. So, think of the people in your life, including your roommates, as people God is using for that purpose. People are a blessing and a gift. Allowing conflicts to wreck friendship will only rob you of its blessings. Use your time in college to be a blessing to others and grow your relationship with God.